As I wrote earlier, the commandments are originally from T.D. Jakes but the discussions are my thoughts. Please enjoy as you read.
2nd Commandment: Don’t expect to be Appreciated
As it is for some parents while training their children, back in Ibadan my parents taught us to always appreciate people when they do things or give us things. Although for the most part we would just say thank you and not collect the thing. As adults, we often get disappointed when we give someone a present and the person doesn’t remember to say thank you for the present. This is the same when we do a neighbour a favour and he forgets to thank you for it.
In the same vein, many people complain that their job doesn’t satisfy them because no one in their workplace appreciates what they contribute. They say things like, “If my supervisor only realized how much I give to this team…” or “I wish my co-workers would acknowledge my contribution….” And “It would be nice to get a little credit for all that I do.” While I understand the innate craving to be recognized, appreciated and valued for what we do, I’m afraid these folks are in for a rather rude awakening.
You see, when this desire to be appreciated becomes the condition upon which your contentment rests, then you have bought into a falsehood that can threaten to keep you in a place of misery.
Our workplace is not the place to be affirmed. Little do we know that this craving for appreciation on the job gives others such power over us, power to define us and influence our self-worth. We become ‘people pleasers’ and not God pleaser. We become ‘people centered’ and not ‘principle centered’. We flow effortlessly with the political terrain in our workplace and become comfortable with the cliques and groups that often degrade our self esteem. We sacrifice our personal values on the alter of unquenchable thirst for appreciation in the workplace.
Your job doesn’t define you. Forgetting our own true identity is one of the easiest ways to set us up for failure in the workplace. If we forget who we really are and begin to think to think that our job defines us, then we are in for a bumpy ride as we rise and fall with the opinions of others around us. Taken to an extreme, we become ineffectual because we are not willing to make decisions or to take risks of our own, for fear that they might negatively affect what others think of us. We become ‘yes man’ or ‘yes woman’ who nods and agrees with like some bobblehead doll on the receptionist’s desk, agreeing with anyone and everyone just to please them and let them like us.
Don’t take it personally. A job should not be source of your affirmation. Get that clear in your mind and maybe get yourself an emblem that reminds you why you are here and why you are not. Now if you get appreciated or affirmed, wonderful. But I can promise you that if being appreciated is your sole reason for performing and working, God will have people overlook you until you get the order of work straight in your mind.
You can get appreciated at home, by your friends or your family, but work is just like it sounds: work. You are on this job to give and to give and to give some more. A job is not a personal environment. It is a professional environment.
Don’t let that job affect who you are; you are sent to bring godliness, not get gratification for personal needs.
Have a very nice day.
N.B. Please note that the commandments are originally from T.D. Jakes but the discussions are my thoughts. Please enjoy as you read.
No comments:
Post a Comment